Yup – its been ages I know

My life in as little words and as many pics as poss.. ya ready?!

Here we go!

Last time we spoke I had spent the weekend in Canvey mildly drunk.
Here I am. Mildly drunk.

I went back to work after all that time off..
..and I went in thinking it was gonna be sunny..

But.. it wasnt:

It was rainin’..
Ah well..

That week it was Jobber’s birthday – we went to the pub:
Jobber and his mate Wing (more on him later), outside the pub…

He’s a good bloke our Jobs… that’s him on the right.
Gonna miss him from the Mail.. admittedly probably JUST him.

Moving on..

The weekend after that: England got knocked out of the World Cup.
It might’ve been the weekend before –
I really cant remember –
My days are swirling together through a mist of champagne and white wine..
Wergh.
Either way – Boooo.. England went out.
We don’t talk about who won it or whatever because nobody cares.
In all seriousness this World Cup will go down as the Cup of Cheats as SO many teams employed under-hand techniques on their road to the finals..

Not.
Good.

Anywhoo..

I watched our last game with my mate Jim.
..and here we are:


Yes.
We are drunk.

..and don’t ask about the sombreros.
I have no idea.

The following day I went to my see friends Roger and Aidan..
They live in this proper nice penthouse apartment overlooking Clapham Common..
The lifts are a bit old and scary mind..
Here I am, in a lift, a bit scared:

So yeah – that was cool.. the corridors are bit ‘Overlook Hotel’ too..
I keep expecting to see a kid on a tricycle screaming “Redrum.. Redrum..” at me… ahem.

But yeah – had a g-r-r-reat time. Roger did some fantastic food.
They’d been down to the farmer’s market in Balham that morning and got some lush veg..
Yum.
..and we spent the rest of the day yelling obscenities to passers by..
Yay.
(that was actually the most puerile fun I’ve had in ages – hehe)

Ooo oo oo!
I forgot!

The Friday before that..
My friend Vicky took me out to the ‘Che’ Exhibition at the V&A Museum.
The V&A:

It was SO cool… They had a big celebration of all things Cuban and there was food and dancing and Mojitos… oh how we love Mojitos…
I don’t know much about Ernesto ‘Che’ Guevara..
Here he is:

Or in fact I should now say.. I didnt know much about him.
The exhibition was wicked – REALLY interesting man..
The guy’s a legend and it’s amazing how his image has grown in the way it has considering this pic was a complete fluke..
Amazing stuff.
So yeah - Vicky took me out to dinner afterwards to a place called The Priory in Olympia.
It was lush and we had SUCH a nice evening just chattin’ y’know?
Was cool.
Tors – if you’re readin’ this – I owe ya!
:o)

Anywhoo – where was I?
That’s right Sunday at Roger and Aidan’s.
That was cool – called a few people a few names and then went on my merry way home..
Bahahahahahahaahahah!
___

Monday – back to work.
Eugh..

But – It was the final leg of my three year stint at the Mail.
The week kind of happened without incident…
Well – aside from The Wing (remember him?) wearing this disgusting shirt…

Talk about Ocular Rapage.
(and yes – that’s Jobber again.. WORKING! Shock Horror!)
Heheheh…

THIS is how you look good at work:

Urinals and all.. lol

Anyway… My last week at work..!

It was cool..
Unsurprisingly I got hammered on my last day.. about two bottles of red wine at lunch.
Probably the best part of a bottle of champagne in the afternoon and then..
God knows how much white wine at the pub afterwards..

But yeah – these are my girls:

Christina, Laura and Louisa… lovely they all are too.
See ya girls – nice workin’ with ya.. Bless ’em.

Apparently they were at my leaving drinks..
But I REALLY dont remember…
Apparently I may’ve embarrassed a few people – I’m sure I’ll hear about it all eventually.. lol

Whoops..
Ah well…

But!

What I do remember (and this would be pretty damn hard to forget) is what my lot bought me for a leaving present..
Check it out!

A nice shiny shiny Nintendo DS Lite.. “Ooooooooooo…”

Yeah man! Awesome –
I am proper impressed..


Anywhoo… my mate Laws came over that night.
Came to my party and everything – it was cool.
She’s a good girl she is – helped me get home!
(dont remember that either – apparently I made us get on the wrong tube but I dont believe her – you hear that Laws?! You tell fibs woman!)
lol

So yeah – the following day my mate Martin threw me a champagne breakfast picnic on Twickenham Green.. it was brill.
Me, Laws, Roger, Aidan, Martin and his girlfriend Lyddy all went…
Here we all are:

Laws & Martin, Martin & Lydia,
Lydia & Adian, Aidan & Roger,
Roger & Me, Me & ….a big church!

But yeah.. the picnic was wicked – Martin made all the food himself and we got hammered… again! I think I didnt really have a hangover per se.. I just carried on drinking from the previous night.. lol
Anywhoo – so we’re all sittin there and Martin says:

“Dudes! Check it out! Pac-Man!”

We had a bit of a chuckle about that.. but THEN.. Martin says:

“Weergh! Those poor ghosts! No wonder those f**kers run! Look at him from the front!”

I laughed so hard… Hahaha.. One of the funniest dudes I know, is Martin.
Love him to bits..

So yeah – after our AMAZING picnic:

Laws and I headed back to Canvey to catch with friends and family.
It was all good.

Had a wicked night on the Isle of Canvey then headed back to Sunny Twickenham..
(not much of a story there I know – but I was out of it and I really dont remember much)

Back in Twix – I thought i’d get an early night..
Right up until I decided to move my room around…
You ever get that?!
No?

Just me then..

Ach well..
At least I have a proper cool desk now:

Yes true believers – that is where yours truly sits when he is recounting his stories to you…

Nice huh?
I think so.. makes life online a lot more enjoyable..

Moving on…

Started at my new job Monday.
All good.

I now work for a company called Refresh Mobile – www.refreshmobile.com

They make things called Mobizines – www.mobizines.com

Its absolutely wicked.
I love it.

The hours are longer – but to be honest – I only noticed that on the first day when I didnt really know what I was doing.. since then – its been cool.
Non-stop. In fact im doin more hours than I should be…
I love it…

Today is Thursday.
Well – its now Friday because its gone midnight – started this blog ages ago.

I’m shattered….

Laters

PS – Ooo! Check this out!
Its Me and Martin!
Aidan did it for us..

How cool is THAT?!

I love it..
In fact – you can tell I love it because i’ve got a printed copy of it above my desk…

My friend Naomi (we call her Roger – she’s Aidan’s girlfriend) says we look like some kind of twisted parallel universe version of Miami Vice..

Hahahahahaahahah..!

Koh Samui – Day 11: Hello Bangkok!

Good morning one and all… its currently 908am in sunny old Bangkok Intl. airport!

I’m en route home.. Woo. Whatley’s Odyssey is drawing to a close.

Had a wonderful night last night – managed to blag some crazy cab driver to take us to the Fisherman’s Village in Bophut (thats how you spell it – I’ve been spelling it wrong – doh) and the place was beautiful! It was like rockin up on an old wild west town with saloons and stuff.. its right on the beach too so we had wonderful views.. we ended up blowing out the Love Kitchen and we went to a place called (get this) ‘Starfish and Coffee’ instead! It was yummo.. We bumped into another bloke (Kevin) from the Spa and he ended up joining us for dinner too.. ..I had Calamaries for starters, followed by a PROPER Thai Green Chicken Curry with Rice.. Then Chocolate Mousse for dessert.. yummo. Drank a fair bit of wine and generally had lots of fun all round – telling jokes and stuff and having lots of giggles. I didnt expecty my friends to come with me to Bophut and yet I’m so glad they did. Guys, if you’re reading this – I had SUCH a wonderful last day and night in Koh Samui. You guys really pulled out the stops for me. Thanks. I’ll never forget it.

Anywhoo – before we went to dinner I had to find a place to crash for the night.. everywhere was 1500-2000bht per night (which is about 30-odd quid or so – not much I know but I had been paying 12quid per night so I wasnt gonna get stung here!) ..anyway – ended up finding this gorgeous room above this pub run by this woman from York called Elizabeth (lovely lady she is) she let me have the room for 800bht when normally she’d charge double! Bless. Her. ..and what a beautiful room it was. A great way to spend my last night in Thailand.

So yeah – got a cab this morning to KS airport and checked in and stuff and everything’s fine.. (well.. aside from saying bye about four times to my friend because first I went to the wrong terminal, then I hadnt paid my departure tax etc…DOH!) ..right up until I had to put my hand luggage through the machine.. Hmm.. People start pointing at my bag on the screen.. Umm…

“Empty your bag sir…”

(dont panic btw – thai prison cells arent equipped with internet access so I’m ok)

Turns out I’d put my Gurpa in my hand luggage instead of my rucksack.. you know.. my Gurpa? The set of pliers thingy wotsit that opens up with a corkscrew, scissors, ruler… KNIFE. Yeah.. DOH! Muppet…

Apparently I can have it back at Heathrow.. Hmm.. we’ll see if it makes it there eh? Place your bets now please!

So yeah – thats about it really.. Gotta go to the transfer desk in about 20mins and check in for my connecting flight to LHR. Then i’ll be on my way home. Flight is at 12:55pm and then I land at 1915 UK time.

If I’m not spending too much time soddin about with my KNIFE then I could be in the pub by 2100hrs! Hahahaahahah.. (on Orange Juice, honest!)

I’ve had an amazing time in Thailand folks. I’ve met some great people, (you know who you are), and experienced some amazing things, (and you know what they are too). I dont regret coming here one iota. I’ve learned so much about me. About my outlook About my direction in life.

I guess only time will tell what long term difference it’ll make.

Short term – I’m gonna have a GREAT summer rocking between London and Brighton.. catchin up with all the cool people from the Spa, (Kev – I’m all over that picnic idea pal – I’ll bring the Liver Flush!) …and dont worry girls – I’ll make my tour of the states at some point – no worries!

As a good friend of mine says: “TTFN folks”

Speak soon.

Koh Samui – Day 10 Cont…

Good afternoon everybody!

First off – the good news!

Nadia was cool about me checkin out early – in fact it wasnt a problem at all! Wooo..

So yeah – I got all checked out by 12pm.. sorted. JUST managed to fit everything into my rucksack (got this whole travelling thing nailed now I reckon – lookin a right traveller – me and Uncle Travellin Matt have got it going on!).. I had some lunch with my friends and we were gonna head up to Bohput together.. BUT. Its been SUCH a nice day! I dumped my stuff and the four of us rocked over to the swimming pool next door which is just divine. I took some pics and stuff to show ya but yeah – been there pretty much ALL day. Its been an absolutely brilliant last day in Thailand. I’m back at the spa now – just saying some goodbyes –

I’m gonna get me a bite to eat and then we’re gonna grab a suntao to Bohput..

When we get there I gotta sort me out a place to stay for the night and THEN we can rock on down to the Luuuuuuuuurve Kitchen. Its gonna be well cool. We’ve all broken our fasts now so EVERYTHING is on the menu! YAY!

Cant get too hammered (if at all – be a good boy now James) cos my flight leaves KS at 740am and I just gotta make that flight!

So yeah – had a great day chillin out with some great friends and now we’re gonna go eat at a great restaurant and hopefully have a great last night together.

I’ll probably post again when I hit Bangkok tomorrow (I’ve got 5hrs to kill between landing from KS and flying to LHR) so I guess I’ll tell you all about it then!

Keep on keepin’ on folks – Whatley is not far from home now..

Koh Samui – Day 10: Goodbyes

Good morning one and all,

Its 920am here and its a beautiful day.

I think I might go and laze by the pool for a bit actually.. so that should be cool.

In other news – I’m a bit concerned about the cash flow situation – so I decided yesterday to checkout today and then travel up to Bohput this arvo, check in somewhere cheap and then go to KS Airport from Bohput. Which will save me as least half of what I’d be spending if I stayed here..

BUT – it transpires that I may have to give 24hrs notice before I can check out. Which could really stuff up my plans.. BUGGER. BUGGER. BUGGER.

I’m just waitin’ for Nadia (the Guest Relations Manager) to turn up so I can discuss it with her.. wish me luck!

I guess next time you’ll hear from me I’ll be en route back to sunny Twickenham.

So – until then.

( maybe! )

Koh Samui – Day 9: Food Glorious Food!

Good afternoon all..

So – Day nine of the trip. Day two of eating again.

The last night was to take it easy – one step at a time – no crap and no over doing it..

So I get to the table and I order myself this mango and cinnamon softie thing… oh it was gorgeous.. and that was that. Then ZenJen ordered these Tofu and raw salad Burritos.. which I was drooling over.. and what d’ya know? ZJ couldn’t eat them both. So I had one.. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm… lovely.
So that was cool.. so then Sheli joined us and she fancied a softie like the one I’d just had.. so she got one.. and got me one too.

Taste explosion!

Its like I’ve never eaten before! Everything tastes so new and so fresh. I’m loving it.. Had a large steamed veggie platter for breakfast/lunch today.. that was well nice. Thinkin ‘about eatin’ some more soon.. my body’s craving it!

I’ll hush now.. don’t wanna go puttin’ all that weight back on!

I’m a bit bored today – ZJ went to Ko Phang Yang this morning, (happy travelling Jen – dont get too wasted!), I havent seen Sheli yet, JenJen’s gone to Tescos and Steve’s gone to get his blood tested (dont ask). So I dunno what I’m gonna do really.. might go introduce myself to some of the new folk that have turned up recently..

I’m thinking about going up to Bophut tomorrow – its closer to the airport y’see and I could stay there the night before I fly and maybe save myself some cash.. I dunno. Will talk it over with a few peeps. See what they think. I’ll let you know I guess.. plus there’s a really nice restaurant there that Kim was telling me about called (Martin – if you’re reading this – you’ll love it.. I know it).. called – “The Love Kitchen”. Brilliant. I HAVE to go there! HAHAHAAHAH..

So we’ll see.

Its Friday today. One more full day to go and the long journey home begins.

Keep smiling folks and I’ll catch up with you all real soon!

Laters.

Koh Samui – Day 8: FOOOD!

Afternoon all.

Today is day eight of my holiday and the first day of non-fasting since I’ve been here! This morning I had to do a warm water colema (as opposed to the coffee solution ones Ive been doing) and then insert some flora grow.. (friendly bacteria) and then wait two hours.. and then eat! Wooo!

Obviously you have to take things slowly at first so I had me a salad to go around lunchtime and ate my way through it while I watched X-Men 3. Which by the way aint that special.. I was expecting much MUCH more from it. Shame really. Ach well.

Anywhoo – back to what I mentioned yesterday -about that step?

Ok – I’ll try and make this as clear as possible – if you’ve been reading this blog from day one you’ll know that at first I was spending a fair bit of time with (amongst others) Lauren, Steve and Zoe..right? Right. And as the week went on I started hangin’ out with ZenJen, Sheli and Kim right? Right. So yeah – anyway a few days ago ZenJen asked me about Reiki and my experiences with it.. so I told her. But I couldn’t tell her without obviously explaining why I was there to put the whole thing into perspective.. which was cool. She was cool and that was that.

Anyway – that night when Kim stayed over.. Kim said: “Jen mentioned you went through a pretty rough breakup before you came over.. and that was what prompted you to come here..” Yeah I said.. I did. …and then it hit me.

I hadn’t thought any of my emotional crap in a good two days.

When I first got here I was talking about it to Lauren, Zoe et al.. and then when I fell in with the girls I had no urge to talk about why I was there. I was just ….there. Enjoying the moment. Living for the moment. ..and I’d put everything else aside.

So yeah – I had a proper moment. I had let go of a little bit more pain and angst and I hadnt even realised it. I smiled a big smile and Kim and I carried on chatting the night away..

I’ve met so many great people here.. swapped loads of email addresses and stuff and there’s a whole bunch of us who are gonna hook up when we get home.

S’gonna be cool.

But yeah – today I am ready to come home.

I feel like I have achieved what I set out to achieve and more and if I had to fly home tonight then I could do so happily.

As it stands I dont leave til Sunday – I’m HOPING I’ve got enough cash left.. (ooer) to last me til Sunday – Steve wants to hire a jeep and go round the island tomorrow – so that should be good – then I think i’ll spend saturday just chilling out round the spa.. then after that? Well after that I guess I’ll pack!

… s’gonna be a long day Sunday. I’m up at 630 to catch the 740 flight to Bangkok.. then catch a 12hr flight from Bangkok around lunchtime ish… I land at Heathrow at 1915 UK time Sunday evening. Fingers crossed I’ll be too knackered to go out and do anything but we’ll see eh?!

My friend Caroline’s just left.. bless her – she’s off to hedonise herself up on Koh Phangyang (I think thats how you spell it) – Happy travelling Caroline – its been good talking to you. You’ve been uber supportive of everything I’ve done and its been good gossiping with you too! …see you back home babe.

Moving on..

OMG. Weight time.

So… before I decided I was coming to Thailand I was around 14st.

Then I started my two week pre-cleanse.

Day one of my fast I was 12st 10lbs.

Today I am 11st 10lbs.

Wow. I cant believe it. I haven’t been that weight since college I swear it!

So there you go. Thin old Whatters.

I’m gonna go get me some food now – catch ya laters potatas!