The iPhone aka The iBone

Before I hit you up with Part 2 of my Adventures in Soho, a brief comedic interlude:

That up there ^ is my friend’s iPhone, last week after his dog had got hold of it. Ouch.
Cue much laughter, finger pointing and merriment at his expense.
The iPhone’s screen is strong. But it seems it isn’t that strong…

‘Dave’ is a bit upset about this (I’ve changed his name to save him further embarrassment)


Anyway – after snapping that pic I asked ‘Dave’ if I could blog it, “Sure..” he said, “…and I’ll update you too.”


“Yep. Get this…”

Turns out, after the aforementioned mauling, Dave tried to claim on his home contents insurance. Note: ‘Tried’.
He has since discovered that he can’t actually claim ‘accidental damage’ as the dog did it deliberately.

(clearly a Nokia fan then)

After that Dave tried to claim it on his business insurance. Still no dice. Thing is, this policy doesn’t cover ‘phones‘.
It covers PDAs. Dave is trying to claim the iPhone is a PDA –

“…which it is!” Dave tells me…

However, the insurance company have never had a claim for an iPhone before…
(they don’t even know how to spell it look)

…and what with it having the word ‘Phone’ in its name, Dave’s hitting another brick wall.

Double Ouch.

Insurance companies can be tough little beggars at the best of times (trust me – I know) but are they in the right in this instance?

Is the iPhone a PDA? Or is it a Phone?

‘Dave’ sold his dog over the weekend.. and I am really, REALLY not kidding.
He was that upset.

So much for man’s best friend…

Koh Samui – Day 5: Crash, Bang, Wallop!

Good afternoon… AGAIN.

Again for me – not for you..

I just spent about an hour typing up the events of today so far, went to the toilet and came back to find someone had closed the window I was using on my PC… I. AM. FUMING – so… try again:

Anyway… remember in my last blog that I mentioned I was gonna go for a bike ride with the girls? ..Jen, Sheli and Kim? Yeah.. well..

I kinda crashed mine.. and before you start laughing! …I had to do it.

Basically – I got on my bike outside the spa, revved it, all fine… kicked it off its stand turned slightly, hit the accelerator to turn… and it jammed. So I hit the brake. Nothing happened. Bugger. I’m now heading into the spa, on a moped, with no brakes and no decrease in speed.. infact.. increase only. Bugger.

Oh yeah.. also just quickly..

The spa is in low season at the moment and the place is pretty quiet.. but all of a sudden there was all these people around! I had to swerve a bit to steer out of the way of the scattering people! probably looked really funny.. in fact it did.. but more on that later.

But! Quick thinkin’ old me decides that the only way to stop this bike before it hits anyone is to get the damn thing onto the ground.. so as soon as the people were clear I leaned it over…. and crashed it.

I get up, a bit shaken up due to the intensity of the last two seconds and I’m confronted by the bike man tellin’ me how to use the soddin brake! I’m like: “Dude. I know how to ride a damn motorbike – I used to have one..Jeez.. the bloody accelerator jammed!” Grr… I get up.. and then I realise my legs hurt a little.. I look down to discover that there’s a certain amount of skin missing from my knee, shin and toes.. hmmm… that’s probably why I’m in pain.. (I said out loud – thinking I’d thought it) I toddle off to the shower rooms to clean the wounds.. that will probably start bleeding soon..

By this time everyone else has caught up with me and they were fussin’ and stuff – there was a first aid box etc.. (which I had to help direct!… TCP, iodine… you name it) ..the three girls I was going to go out with caught up with me and made sure I was ok and stuff.. but by now my proper chilled out blood has decided that maybe it should be doing something about the missing skin.. ie: bleeding out of it maybe?!

So Sheli clocks the blood and she bails pretty much immediately.. she’s not a pussy.. far from it.. she’s a nutter in fact.. but she is however a haemophiliac and if what happened to me happened to her she’d have to go to hospital and stuff and there’d be all kinds of badness.. so yeah. In the end it was just Kim and Zen Jen who went on the ride.. Kim promised to bring me back a gift.. so that was cool.

Anywhoo – I got all bandaged up and dragged my sorry self up to my room.

Whereupon I was visited by Steve and Lauren.. which was cool. Lauren was en route to a massage but she gave me a hug and stuff and then Steve taught me how to play Chinese Chess (interesting but bloody hard) and then some friends came up and asked if I fancied watchin’ Sin City.. i didn’t (was still playin chess) but I went down after a while.. so I watched the last two thirds.. Lauren bought me back a pad and a pen from her travels which was REALLY cool because I’ve been dying to sketch since I’ve got here.. (and she wrote me this really sweet note about healing physically and emotionally and stuff – bless her – she is lovely ) yeah.. that’s kind of my day.

Since startin’ this blog post (the first attempt anyway) ZenJen and Kim have come back and Kim got me this cool Buddha chain to wear.. which is pretty rockin’.

Oh yeah.. and as soon as they got back and realised I was ok – they proceeded to tell me how hilarious the beginnings of my accident were.. ie: They looked up to see what was going on only to see me shoot off into the spa! “VROOM! …and you were gone dude! We thought you were gonna come out of the other exit with a coconut juicer in your hand or somethin’ shoutin ‘i forgot this!’ Hahahah…” ..bless em.

I think I’m gonna be holed up in here for a while now – my legs HURT dudes. So Uncle Travelling Matt’s postcards* probably wont be as detailed in the near future!

Dunno what I’m doing tonight.. need to go get a colema soon ish. But I need some new bandages first… hmmm.. that’ll probably hurt a bit..

So yeah – guess i’ll see ya later folks.

Take it easy..

*You know Uncle Travelling Matt right?