Its 9:38am here and I’m in a good mood.. better than I was earlier anyway – couldn’t sleep at all last night – drifted off about 3ish.. up at 7am for my detox drink.. grrr… but yeah – the sun’s just come out so I’m gonna update this and go catch some rays..
So yeah – yesterday..
So I sat down with Steve and co and walked back through the lounge area and some guy had put Amelie on the DVD player.. I walked up to the sofa and said out loud to no one in particular – “Amelie.. Wow.. I love this film..”
And this girl who was sittin’ on the sofa just looked up at me and said “Why dont you watch it with me then?”
I looked at her, she smiled and me.. I smiled back and said:
“Y’know what… I think I will..”
So I did – I nipped back to the table told the others I’d be gone for a while.. and rocked back to the sofa and sat down next to this funky chick from Brighton called Jen.. she’s cool. So yeah – we talked about the film and stuff and THEN it hit me.. I hadn’t seen Amelie in ages! In FACT – I’ve only ever seen it once.. I fell in love with it – I think its a beautiful story, beautifully told and beautifully written with a certain poeticness about it.. so yeah – I saw it at the cinema YEARS ago in Southend with my mate Natalie.. Then I remembered why I hadn’t seen it since.. I’d always tried to get my ex to watch it because I knew how much she loved film and how much she’d enjoy it and she’d always flatly refused because I’d seen it and fell in love with it with Natalie! I never bought it on DVD because I knew it’d be more trouble than it was worth and stuff and… well – it was bonkers.. It always used to get to me how my ex would deprive herself of such a wonderful piece of film-making just because I’d seen it with someone else y’know?! …at the time I kind of just let it ride but now… now I’m like – WTF?! What’s that about?! I mean Jeez… So yeah – I enjoyed watching Amelie just that little more – it was like it was meant to be y’know? I mean what OTHER film could I just happen to watch while I was here y’know?!
So yeah – it was perfect..
Throughout the film this lass and I were having a bit of a chat and stuff and then after the film had finished I leaned back and looked up at her upside down and said
“Thank you.. so much.. I doubt I would’ve watched that if you hadnt have asked me.. “
“Awww, now worries mate” she said..
“So yeah.. I feel like I should ask you out for a drink and stuff but I’m kinda fasting so I cant.. “
“Ah well..” she said.. (Jen finished her fast about a week ago)
“..and our afternoon at the cinema went so well” I said.. a bit cheekily..
“Yeah..” ..she giggled.. “I’m actually going to see MI:3 tonight if you fancy it?”
“Yeah.. sounds like a great plan – cheers dude..”
“Cool – well I’m going with a mate so meet me back here at about half eightish yeah?”
“Yeah” I said.. and it was cool – we hooked up later and had a coconut drink and stuff then got a bus/van thing down to the cinema – MI3 wasn’t on so we watched Poseidon instead.. Jen’s friend turned up but went home because she was feeling rough so it was just me and her.. and it was cool.
Had such a nice evening.. it was like being thirteen again. We just snuggled up in the cinema together.. held hands and stuff.. watched the film.. had a giggle.. then we got a couple of taxi bikes home afterwards and I walked her home (back to her hotel anyway – she’s not staying here) we had a hug and peck.. (no snogging) ..and that was it. It was great.. there was no massive pressure to take things further.. there was no massive pressure to do anything at all.. so nothing happened and I think I felt better for it.. y’know?
Part of me was happy because I wasn’t erasing the memory of my past and part of me was happy because I wasn’t rushing into my future..
The respect was there for my ex and also for this girl that I’d met like 6hrs previous..
Its like Jet said: “..protect your heart before you give it to anyone else..” ..so yeah – last night I went on a ‘date’ (I think) and it was cool.
I feel good today. Yesterday I let go of a bit more.. and I felt.. I feel better for it. I don’t think I really ever understood how much baggage I had..
I don’t think it will all drain out while I’m here but I think being here is helping me pull the plug out y’know?
.. there you go.
Speak soon – the Sun’s out and I’ve been here longer than I wanted to be..